Snob

My return to school this year has made me into... a snob. Or an anti-snob, which is in and of itself pretty snobby. There are too many snobs. Snob. Now it doesn't sound like a word. Snob snob snob.

It has sapped all of my time- well, not really. Combined with my general laziness and my slight lack of time, I have not blogged in some time. It took a bit of cajoling to win back my sponsor. They pay me tens of theoretical dollars. I can't forgo that money, my sirs and madams.

I am an anti-Abercrombie-&-Fitch snob, which means that if I ever stop wasting my time and start doing something worthwhile, they will NEVER sponsor me. I really hate the brand, even if it is begrudgingly well made, because it symbolizes everything I hate. Most of my childhood hatred can be summarized in Abercrombie & Fitch. It symbolizes vapidity to me, the idea of buying something just so you can have the tiny logo on your shirt pocket, bragging to everybody that you just paid $48 for a t-shirt that's so thin you'll pull holes in it by Week 5. Without the logo, the shirt would be costing a lot less. I hate it. I HATE IT.

I am, in general, a snob. But I am a Harry Potter snob almost more than anything.

I hate it when people only watch the movies and don't read the books (what's the point?), I hate it when people watch one movie and they declare themselves 'a fan' (the fact that you own five Hot Topic shirts with Rupert Grint's face on them is, while admirable, NOT directly related to you being a fan), and worst of all, I hate annoying Harry Potter fans who feel the need to rub their Harry Potter lovin' in everybody's faces. We get it, Irritating-Girl-in-My-Math-Class. You've read the books "forty-two times each! I SO wanna go!"

See if I care. Go on, ask me if I care.

NO.

But worst of all is:

"I can't wait to go! My friend got us tickets and everything! So which movie is it? Five?" (True story, by the way.)

AAARGH. Give ME the tickets!

I am also a clothes snob, but I am the worst kind of all- I am a hypocritical clothes snob. I care more about what other people wear than what I wear. Like K. (Remember K, my brother who I represent with a fake initial?) I care very much about what he wears, which makes him want to walk outside in a pair of shabby clown pants and only one suspender.

I wish I owned suspenders. But two, at least.

Quote for Thursday, November 18, 2010:

It is impossible, in our condition of Society, not to be sometimes a Snob.

-William Makepeace Thackeray

(http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/snob.html)

Muse for Today:

I am so tired that I cannot decide whether 'Thackeray' is an awful last name or a good one, and whether coupling it with 'Makepeace' makes it better or worse.

Smarter Than My Teacher

Those people at The Improbable Purchases Store agreed to sponsor Muse for a Day, so for every post I write, I get paid tens of theoretical dollars! (And no, 'tens' is not a typo for 'tons''. i dont duooe TYpos.)

So they tried to counter my overdose of Essence of Self-Esteem with a Humility Chaser, which is working rather well, but I still have the dregs of Too Much Self-Esteem swilling around in my bloodstream. Which explains this post somewhat, even though even if I wasn't all filled with Humility and Self-Esteem, would have made me proud.

But if I didn't have all of that Self-Esteem, I wouldn't blog about it.

Two Things I Know Better Than My Social Studies Teacher:

1. Contrary to what you told my class, Ares was the god of war, not Hermes. Why This is a Little Bit Excusable: To all of you aren't mythology people like I am, Hermes and Ares do sound a little bit the same.
2. Mona Lisa doesn't have eyebrows in the portrait. In da Vinci's time, it was fashionable for women to shave off their eyebrows completely. Why This is a Little Bit Excusable: My teacher isn't teaching us art.

It's a little bit upsetting when you're smarter than the people who are supposed to be teaching you. Now I can't trust anything my teacher has said!

I should be running the class!

No, I shouldn't. I will quit writing before I lose my sponsor.

I'm Not Self-Centered, I'm the Best

I've been reading all of my old posts, and I am the funniest and best person I know! I'm almost crying from my excellent humor! How did I become so riotous?

And since I know you all are always interested in news that has to do with me, I graced the employees of the local Improbable Purchases store with my most marvelous presence to inform them that they were totally at fault for my overdose of Essence of Self-Esteem, and that I was deeply insulted that I needed a tonic to appreciate how riveting I actually am. I want the Essence of Self-Esteem to be removed from my system.

After laughing for fifteen minutes (they could just sense the aura of my most striking humor), they said that if I 'came to terms with my own flaws', my self-esteem would sink back down to its normal level.

*scoffs* What flaws?

Whatever.

Read about me taking Essence of Self-Esteem here.

I'm the Most Humble and Intelligent Person Ever, and You are Lucky to Know Me

I bought some Essence of Self-Esteem at the local Improbable Purchases store, because some people think that I don't have enough of it. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to be working. Oh, well. I'm sure you'll notice a change in my attitude over the next few posts.

On to the post.

A lot of things have happened to me in the last week.

School started.

I got my first ever cell phone.

Now, these two I had no control over. If I had any control over the education system, I wouldn't be here right now. And you would be working for me.

*OMINOUS CRASHES OF THUNDER AND LIGHTNING*

And a cell phone was not my choice either. I would prefer not to have one, actually, but telling this story would disclose too much personal information than I ever want to tell the Internet.

But the third thing is something which is a shame, shame, shame of mine.

I have two pairs of skinny jeans.

If you don't know me, you might find it difficult to understand why this upsets me. Well, because I've always thought that I was better than that. Better than falling for some trend so that I could be 'cool'.

I tormented myself with this for a while, and then several sprigs of reason sprouted into my mind.

1. Under NO circumstances, in any way in this lifetime will I EVER, EVER, EVER be considered cool, and one style of clothing is not going to make me this way. Really. Even if I wore a shirt that said 'I am cool" it would be a lie. (Actually, anyone who wears a shirt proclaiming that they are cool is automatically not cool.)
2. What is cool, anyway? It's an illusion. Pants cannot make someone cool. What are they without the pants? Pantless, that's what. Pantless and uncool and probably embarrassed because they aren't wearing any pants, and today was the day that they chose to wear their favorite Care-Bears underwear. So, being cool is actually embarrassing and painful. (If you stay in school, you can be as smart as me but not really.)
3. If I had bought these pants at the start of skinny jeans trend, then I would be a stupid trend follower. But I didn't. So there. (Cold comfort. And I find that comfort is best served with a side of chocolate and sympathy. Oh, self! You are so good at turning an already bad joke into a prolonged, obscure, worse one. You are so smart.)

I know there are people who follow fashion closely, and I'm not saying that they are idiots. I'm saying that 'tis more important to wear what you want to wear, even if it looks kind of awful, than to only follow what other people think is cool and not look like yourself at all.

Sometimes, I feel as though all of my moral principals are not common. That not everyone thinks the way I do.

And then I realize that I'm right, and I congratulate myself heartily and appreciate how lucky I am to know a person as smart as me.

Look at how humble I am in this post. Ah, that's one of the things I love most about myself.

*OMINOUS CRASHES OF THUNDER AND LIGHTNING*

I thought I turned my Ominous Crashes of Thunder and Lightning Machine (patent pending) off! Can't even trust myself anymore, no matter how unbelievable a prodigy I am.

Quote for Saturday, August 28, 2010:

I am the only good person for quotes anymore. Ha!

-New, Brimming-with-Confidence Me

Muse for Today:

Gasp! I may have overdosed on Essence of Self-Esteem! The people at the Improbable Store warned me about this! They called it... Overconfidence. They said that after overdosing Essence of Self-Esteem, there is no going back!

Well, who said that that's a bad thing? I'm so amazing, it's only right that I should appreciate what an intelligent, witty, superior, popular, funny, lovable, talented, fantastic, nimble, literate, good-smelling, enviable genius I am! Besides, I never do anything wrong, so my overdose of Essence of Self-Esteem was the fault of the people at the Improbable Purchases store for selling me too much of it. Ugh, corporate people. They'll never be like me, their brains are too diminutive to handle everything that I know!

Sorry this Muse is so long... I became so lost in my excellent word choice...

One More Thing

Oh. Right. Guess who hasn't read the Atlantis Complex yet? And guess who else is rubbing it in my face by blogging about it? All the time?

(This is, in case you hadn't noticed, a VERY SORE SUBJECT.)

Books, Barnes and Noble and Me

Hello. I know it's been a while.

In Which I Complain and Exhibit Several Reasons Why I Need Therapy

I am a very easily anxious person. I worry about everything, and recently my worrying has hit a fever pitch because I am starting at a brand new school, and I am disgustingly scared.

I am finding ridiculous things to worry about.

It's getting out of hand. Really out of hand.

Have you ever felt so worried you can't breathe? Is this not normal?

And here. The world has handed me something else to fret unreasonably about.

Barnes and Noble is going up for sale and possibly out of business. Read the article here. Or HERE. They're both the same, click on your favorite one.

I learned this during my latest trawling through Yahoo! and I was somewhat worried.

Like most bookworms who live in the U.S., I have frequented B&N many times, and while I have a nice indie bookstore quite close, Barnes and Noble is a lot better organized and I go there when I'm looking for something specific, like a book for school or something. (The independent bookstore is good for serendipity.)

The article said that physical copies of products, like books and CDs, are slowly dying out because people opt for the digital version instead.

I often buy digital CDs, because most of the music I like is from YouTube musicians, and I don't see the sense in paying extra for shipping when I can buy the digital copy.

But books!

I grew up with books as closer friends than almost anybody else I knew. I had a fair smattering of friends (Am I lying? You decide!) but they paled in comparison to Junie B. Jones; Anne Shirley; the Bailey School Kids (Howie, Eddie, Melody and Liza); and Charlie Bucket. (I was really trying not to put anything Harry Potter related in there, because it seems like everything I put on this here blog has at least one HP plug.)

The actual feeling of holding the book in your hand, really turning the pages, losing the book because you left it at the kitchen table- these are some things that even the iPad (in all its fairly deserved glory) cannot replicate.

It's sad that a whole generation of kids is not going to be able to experience that. Someday in the future, people will be keeping paper books in museums like we keep hieroglyphics, and parents will be pointing at them in their glass cases and saying to their children, "See, honey? People used to read off of those. They didn't download information directly into their brains like you do."

That day is looming larger.

I'm all for the Internet, and it's great that people can hold their entire library- their entire lives- in the palm of their hand, but books are just nice once in a while.

Show some love. Buy a book.

(dramatic ending)

And now I'm back to thinking about school and I'm panicking. AARGH. Why is summer so SHORT?

GARGGH

Fine. I did it. I caved.

I read the bloody Atlantis Complex excerpt.

I held out for a long while, but I am very disappointed with my self-control, or lack thereof.

However. It was a good, if infuriating, excerpt.

I was kind of confused, because I can't focus well when I read on a screen, but that will be rectified come August, when I finally get the book.

Things I have learned:

1. I am taller than Artemis by one inch. This I do not like. It seems awkward to me.
2. He has gone mental. Why is he so superstitious? It's crippling him!
3. Adam Adamsson is one of the most unfortunate names I've ever heard, but I hate him, so that's fine.
4. It is true, and B's birthday is Artemis Fowl's birthday (September 1). Too bad she doesn't care. I would care.
5. I don't like how it's called Artemis Fowl and the Atlantis Complex. The only series I know that can pull off the 'and the' is Harry Potter.
6. 'That sounds insane, Artemis realized. Even to me.'
7. I hate Hartemis (Holly/Artemis) shippers. I hate them I hate them I hate them. And this chapter pricked up my Hartemis sensors and made me want to spit poison.
8. Everyone seems different. That is upsetting.
9. 'In spite of their historic dislike for each other'? Trouble Kelp and Artemis Fowl? What?
10. Artemis's attitude is starting to make me hate him. He's doubting himself, blaming Butler, not being smug and snarky. What happened?
11. 'The number gods'? The bloody NUMBER GODS? ARTEMIS! GET A GRIP!
12. '"Foaly is singing," said Holly. "Surely that's illegal?"'
13. Foaly has a foal!
14. "Worry not, lesser intellect."

I am being driven crazy.

"Happy First Birthday!"

You can pretend I'm singing, and that I sound like a chorus of angels. Everyone would like a chorus of angels to sing to him or her on his or her birthday, and my blog is no exception.

Also, Happy Centennial! (Although a centennial usually refers to one-hundred years, I will happily misuse this word in the name of my blog's first birthday and my ONE-HUNDREDTH POST!)

Here's to another year of survival for all, whether I blog during this year or not (predictably enough, most likely not)! Stay in school, kids!

Quote for Sunday, July 18, 2010:

Every ten years a man should give himself a good kick in the pants.

-Edward Steichen

(http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Birthday)

Muse for Today:

I hope I never grow up, so that I can always appreciate good quotes like that.

Next Blog >>

I have often clicked the Next Blog >> button at the top of the page just to see what comes up. And I need one more post for my ninety-ninth one, so I have decided to write about this experience.

I am actually making a really big deal about this one-hundred posts thing. It's my blog's birthday and my one-hundredth post on July 18th, but so what? They're only numbers, right?

It's actually far too late to take this rational point of view, so! On to my project!

1. http://freeflan.blogspot.com/ (fReE fLan: A Blog About Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Joe Jonas): I saw the heading at the top, and some of my brain cells died. Who, in their right, sane mind, wants to pursue Joe Jonas? Not me. But Taren apparently does. Don't get me wrong, she seems like a lovely person, I guess, but that is one major character flaw. And then I saw the video. My mind flopped and flipped from confusion. I went to the next page, and I really didn't like the blog. But don't take the personally, Taren, 190 other people sure like you. And after that I was done, so I hit Next Blog >>...
2. ...and came to http://3giggles.blogspot.com/ (Always Dream in Vivid Color): A nice, sweetish sort of blog, where a mother takes pictures of her kids and posts them on the Internet. Nothing really remarkable, but it's a nice way to keep up with the family (if you know them personally). I'm sure her 23 followers like her pictures, because they're not bad. I saw the first page, figured that the other pages couldn't be much different, and clicked the next button...
3. ...and showed up here, at this blog http://onelifeonelives.blogspot.com/ (One Life. One Lives... Death Arrives. One Dies) with the cheerful heading. I like the background (ha), and it seems to be an okay blog, although he is an infrequent blogger (but if you look at his blogs, he has thirty-six blogs, so I'm sure he updates at least one of them). Several of them seem to be about cricket, and most of them seem to be about sports. It's an odd blog that sounds something like me, only professional, more mature, and well-written. I'm done here, though it's the best I've seen so far.
4. http://beccaboojones.blogspot.com/ (becca jones: The World Through My Eyes) was my next unwilling destination. Honestly, this blog seems like Taren's future. It's a really, really upbeat, chipper blog, so I kind of hate it, but she just got engaged, so congratulations, Becca Jones! It's one of those day-in-the-life blogs, and it wasn't bad, just EXTREMELY HAPPY, and therefore not my type.
5. The last one, http://wwwpumpkinqueen.blogspot.com/ (The Pumpkin Queen's Halloween Haven!), was really pretty darn wired. This person longs and longs for Halloween, and she needs to lay off a bit. She keeps very close tabs on everything about the American holiday, which is deranged in an inspiring way. Kudos to you, O Pumpkin Queen. I can only imagine how crazy other people must find you.

That was Next Blog >>, a segment which will probably never show up on this blog ever again. Thanks, and good-bye!

Quote for Thursday, July 15, 2010:

YouTube is amazing. And really scary. Just a thought.

-Me

It All Ends Here

WARNING: IF YOU ARE EASILY UPSET BY EXTREME NERDINESS, HATE HARRY POTTER, BOOKS, AND MEMORIES AND/OR ARE A TWILIGHT FAN, DON'T READ THIS POST.

HOLD ON. IF YOU'RE ANY ONE OF THE ABOVE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? ACTUALLY, YOU'RE PROBABLY VERY UPSET ALREADY, SO JUST GO AWAY.

The post starts...now.

LOOK AT THIS. Just look at this.

Fine. Blogger is being stupid, and you can't look at this. But here, I am going to make this link all linky and then you can.

AARGH. Look at...ah...this.

THIS, my friends, is the NEW POSTER for the FIRST PART of the SEVENTH MOVIE that comes out in NOVEMBER but now doesn't seem so far away.

I am mistaken in my assumption that everyone I know has the same level of Harry Potter furfling fangirliness as I do. (I am just making up words like anything today.)

The last movie is coming out in July of next year, and I am for sure going to overestimate how far away that really is. Next year.

When I finally grew up and properly discovered the Internet and realized that (internal gasp) other people in the world like Harry Potter too (and, for some reason, all of them are on the Internet!), I was kind of surprised at how well all of this was going. I didn't even know about all of the Pottermania until well after 2007, and once I did, I half-wondered why everything didn't just dry up after Deathly Hallows.

It was the movies, mostly. The fact that there were actors to interview and movies to see and directors to criticize made it all almost..okay, I guess. At least, it did for me once I puzzled all of this out. (Which didn't take that long. Because I am a prodigal genius who enjoys telling lies about myself, like about the fact that I am a prodigal genius.)

And that was fine, because at that point the Half-Blood Prince movie hadn't even come out.

But now NOVEMBER 2010 is staring me in the face and I felt very, very sad.

Especially after seeing this.

The Magic Begins and It All Ends Here.

I grew up with these books, and while I believe that I would still really read, I do not think that I would appreciate books as much as I do had I not read them.

As utterly stupid as this sounds, I remember the first time that I held the hardback copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, and how much hope I had, and how bittersweet everything felt when I was done.

Will the movie feel the same as it did with the book? I don't think so, but I know that I am going to be very upset when this is all over.

Giving Up

I have three more posts until the 99th post, and all I can think about is how little I have to actually say.I mean, yesterday was Independence Day here in the U.S., but honestly what is there really to say about that I mean really there's nothing right okay.

And I did randomness when I was tired and that was a fiasco that I am not willing to repeat.

So what?

I can do pictures. This particular picture is from here.

But is that really worth it?

I can do hyperlinks- no, wait. I did that the other day, didn't I? (shudder shudder)

More pictures!

I give up.

Quote for Monday, July 5, 2010:

I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.

-W.C. Fields

(http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/topics/topic_funny3.html)

Nonsense

Well, England was out of the running for the World Cup a few days ago, and I was a little cross over that then, but I honestly never really cared, so I wasn't that upset. I just thought that they were better than that. What happened to brilliant soccer playing? I thought that was what England were known for.

Did you know that sweat is actually odorless on its own? It gets that lovely scent we all know and love when it mixes with bacteria.

I'm really tired. I should go to bed, but I'm not that tired. Actually, I just might be that tired. Never mind.

I know karate. But not that well. I am waiting for the day when I will need to say "I know karate!" and it'll work because it's the truth. But still, not that well.

Look! Trailers!

• This one is for Flipped, and I flipped (har har. Hmm?) when I saw it, because that book is lovely and hopefully the movie will shape up a lot like the book. I like the song at the end, and I know I've heard it before. But i have no idea what it is!
• And this one is for Parts 1 and 2 of Deathly Hallows! NOVEMBER! I can HARDLY WAIT!

I hate marshmallow Peeps now, but I used to love them when I was little. My tastes were different. Artificial food dye and sugar in the shape of cute animals appeals less to me now.

Wow, I really should go to sleep. I'm starting to sound insane. Marshmallow Peeps? Really? They are SUGARY. And that is all.

Look! More hyperlinks! My cousin (not Questa or B, another one) showed me this site and it's addicting. I know lots of bookish things, apparently!

Artemis Fowl! ARTEMIS FOWL! I'm rereading The Arctic Incident, and Artemis is nicer when he's being evil.

I'm going to sleep.

Later edit: I apologize for this post, but I'm just going to put it out there because frankly, I've nothing better to say.

One MILLION!

If you had a million *enter plural of currency here*, what would you spend it on?

I am fond of making lists, and I always always always think about this question. (I think in dollars because do I really have do explain this anymore?)

I am still on a bit of a happy buzz because ENGLAND IS ADVANCING after they WON a couple of hours ago, so I'll make a more cheerful list than my usual pessimism would permit.

(Sorry. World Cup fever. Normally, I hate organized sports, especially on the wretched box, but my father and brother don't like the English team, so how could I resist rooting for them? It's an effect of living in this house.) (Yes, the United States is advancing, too- but shut up, Sarcastic Susie.)

So. England.

What would I do with a million dollars?

• Go on a trip to England
• Gloat to my brother that I have more money than him
• Buy myself enough sandwiches for the rest of my life
• Save at least a quarter of it
• Buy myself The Beatles Box Set
• Give maybe about half to my parents
• I would go and buy up a Barnes and Noble (or at least all of the decent books in there. I would also save money to buy books online.)
• Donate some to the library/cancer research/are there any orphanages around here? Then I could donate there/The Nature Conservancy/PETA/a science lab/anything else that comes up
• Buy that ridiculous number of nice t-shirts from Threadless
• Buy jeans. I need some jeans.
• Buy some magnetic chalkboard paint (because I'm not sure if it exists) and paint the wall in my room with it
• Go to visit my cousins
• Buy a guitar (so that I can carry it around and look cool, even though I'll probably stop practicing three minutes after having it)
• Bribe someone into giving me a copy of The Lost Hero early, because I made the mistake of reading the excerpt and now I can't wait for it to come out!
• A microphone!
• A black light
• Whipped cream- enough to swim in. And then I'd swim in it, and it would be amazing. But there'd still be enough to eat.
• Music? (I'm actually running out of things to write. I can't believe that.)
• I'd leave it aside until I thought of other stuff to buy. Or save all of it.

My conclusion? Money can't buy most of the things I want, like to actually finish that story that I started two years ago. Perseverance and determination can! *heroic music plays in the background*

And I don't have too much of those, so...

*Music fizzles out*

So.

What would you do with a million dollars?

Superficiality

Yeah. I'm clearly on the computer right now.

The other day, after I published the post, I dragged myself off of the computer and went- le gasp!- outside!

I saw the sun, smelled the grass, saw actual people, and rode my bike for the first time since April. It was very weird, but very fun as well.

I still can't spell weird. I always come up with with either wired or wierd, both of which are so horribly wrong that it's comical. I can't spell 'necessary', either. I always put in two "c's" instead of one. GAH. That's why I prefer paper, because paper doesn't tell me when I'm wrong. I'm never distracted by red and green squiggly red lines when I write on paper, and I can just (pretend to) write, without being distracted by every darn thing that I spelled wrong!

However, what I'm trying to say is that going outside is a very nice experience, and I am trying to do it more often.

Yesterday, five minutes after I went outside, a thunderstorm started, so maybe Mother Nature hates me and wants me as far away from her as possible. I don't know. Maybe I'll try again some other time.

But besides my laziness and my lack of desire to finish all of the summer math I must finish, I have a really minor problem.

Superficiality bothers me. It more than bothers me. I have gone on and on about how much I HATE superficiality, and it should have gone on that list of things that I hate.

I know all of these stupid girls who care more about how they look and who they date than what goes on inside their heads. Half of them haven't even heard of malaria, genocide, and other stuff that's actually really pretty important.

Hello, future of the world! (I live in the U.S., and most of the girls I know are like this. Hopefully not too many other girls in the world- whether they're American or not- behave this way.)

I'm not saying that it isn't nice to take pride in one's appearance. It's better if you do that, actually. It shows how you think of yourself. But not enough people stop thinking about that?

What am I trying to say?

Don't be superficial.

What makes someone superficial? If someone is a deep person but is also completely and totally obsessed with his or her hair, what does that make them? Is it even possible to be deep and still have an almost-overwhelming fondness for one's hair? If it's almost-overwhelming, maybe not, but what if you just really like your hair to look nice? If someone usually listens to good quality music but likes one really filler kind of music, what...what is that?

I guess why would be a better word.

Quote for Saturday, June 19, 2010:

"I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin-deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas?"

-Jean Kerr

(http://quotetoexpress.blogspot.com/2010/06/pancreas.html)

Muse for Today:

How long I can go while avoiding my summer math. I haven't done any since Monday. I have to turn it in tomorrow, though.

Not a Real Blog Post

I came on here and I realized that Hey, I need to actually post something today! because I want to keep up my nice little derived coincidence that I told you about in the last post, remember? That one? Yes? Good.

Too bad my brain is mush from too much music at all times, Beatlemania (about forty years too late, but not my fault: I wasn't born) and lack of inclination. I mean, I actually do nothing all day long except read and write. And there are too many other things that I should be doing. Going outside is an event for me. I need to get up and actually do something that requires movement! Effort! MOTIVATION!

So I write a blog post, which does not...actually...fully fulfill all of the requirements entirely. Do you really want to hear about all this? I'm sure you have enough in your life without hearing from me No, I didn't think so.

I'm getting off of the computer. I need to do something (anything).

Good-bye.

Quote for Thursday, June 17, 2010:

Don't yield to that alluring witch, laziness, or else be prepared to surrender all that you have won in your better moments.

-Horace, Satires

(http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Laziness)

Muse for Today:

I was all prepared to say, "Nothing! Didn't you read the post?" but two exciting things are happening tomorrow: the Harry Potter theme park is opening in Orlando (but I can't go, so I shall have to gaze from afar) and Toy Story 3 is opening. While I am too young to fully understand The Beatles, I am far too old for Toy Story, but I shall go anyway.

Dreaming

Have you ever had anything completely destroyed?

Once, I had this little statue of two women churning butter. It was a nice little wooden statue, and I liked it a lot. My brother was angry with me (for some reason), so he broke it on purpose when I wasn't home. I fixed it with a hot glue gun, but then he just broke it again.

That made me angry. But none of his stuff is breakable, so my revenge was (and is) still uncarried-out.

That isn't what I'm talking about, though. I mean mentally. Like someone told you a fact, and it ruined the little picture you had going in your head.

I'm explaining this badly.

It's like the one guy who 'ruins everything.' You know, that one fact-checker who is always like "Dogs can't fly! That's impossible!" and you just want to tell them that you're just dreaming anyway, idiot, so shut up and let me think!

But even after that, you can never look at what you were thinking about the same way again.

I am usually that person, but I am starting to look upon myself with disdain, if that makes any sense.

It was like I found out that Vertigo was an actual place. (It's a club in Germany.) The song was a little less nice after that.

If I have mercilessly confused you, I apologize. I don't even know what the heck I'm talking about sometimes.

Quote for Sunday, June 13, 2010:

"I told you I was sick."

-written on Jeremiah Johnson's grave

(http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Epitaphs#J)

Muse for Today:

http://aircastlefancy.blogspot.com/2010/06/toast-song.html

and I saw Toy Story 2 yesterday and I feel so, so OLD. I'm not that old. I hope.

A Trying Feat

Look! I am back!

(Although you probably had no idea that I was even gone, since my posting is infrequent at best.)

I really am back, though. I just came back from a trip to Arizona yesterday. But more on that later.

I am trying to orchestrate something marvelous. It has almost been one year since I started this blog, and this is my ninety-second post. I am trying to have my one-hundredth post on this blog's one-year anniversary. This, however, requires more posting than I am used to.

So. It is now June 10th. I have a month and eight days to post eight times.

GRRR. It's not like I ever have anything useful to say, anyway. I mean, just blather on and on all of the time. I'm sure I can make it. I hope.

So. Arizona.

F.R.A.S'S Rules for Visiting Arizona:

1. Bring a water bottle. Honestly. We went in June, and that's not even the hottest month of the year. And it was really, really hot.
2. Bring chapstick. Arizona is one dry state.
3. Go there for kind of a long time. DO NOT try to squeeze all of the sights into one or two days. You will be half-dead by lunchtime. Spend all day at the Hoover Dam, all day at the Grand Canyon, all day at Montezuma Castle, all day at wherever-else-you-are-going.
4. Jeans are a bad idea. Especially if you're hiking all day- they start sticking to you. I saw this fate in most of the hikers we saw at the Grand Canyon. Yuck.
5. Make sure your camera has a wrist strap. Actually, make sure that you have a camera before you buy a wrist strap. There are lots of things to take pictures of, and lots of places where you can lose your camera.
6. Do your research first. There was this great place called Oak Creek Canyon. It's called the 'cousin to the Grand Canyon.' (Why?) Well, my parents read about it in an outdated guidebook that didn't mention how you can swim in the creek. There's this bit that is all slippery, and people sit on the current and just slide. K and I didn't bring swimsuits. So we just went down in our clothes. It was really, really fun, but I do not recommend it because it took all day for my clothes to dry off. So plan ahead! Make sure you know what you're doing, and bring everything you might possibly need.
7. Bring lots of books and notebooks. This is only if you drive around a lot and like reading and writing. My family and I had a lot of time in the car, so I read and wrote. Just bring something to do, like a music player, for the driving.
8. Bring a camera charger. Actually, bring a charger for everything. Battery runs out fast.
9. Don't go on a plane. Where did the peanuts go? No snacks? Only drinks? They charge you for blankets and pillows ($8). It costs twenty-five dollars to check in one piece of luggage. Flying on planes in America used to be fun. Now it's just vaguely annoying.
10. Bring lotion! My mother and I snuck into a Bath and Body Works at an Arizonian mall so that we could use the testers of lotion and perfume there on our hands and dusty feet. Planes don't allow the full tubes of lotion, and hotel lotion stinks. So bring the sample sizes. You'll need it.
11. Don't go with your brother. He will drag you into stadiums and cry when they aren't open. LEAVE HIM AT HOME.

I hope those rules helped.

Quote for Thursday, June 10, 2010:

Richard: His head is shaped like a football.

Emily: It is not.

Richard: If he fell asleep in the park, someone would try to punt him.

-Gilmore Girls: Season 2 (Sadie, Sadie)

(

http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Gilmore_Girls/Season_2

)

Muse for Today:

Twitter. How can such idiots be on Twitter?

Something I find very amusing

For those of us who have read The Artemis Fowl Files, are ardent fans of Artemis Fowl II himself (so, only me) and wanted to listen to their kind of music would have looked up I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For by U2 (Butler's favorite song, which he said could have been written for Artemis) and It's No Game, Part 2 by David Bowie, Artemis's favorite song by a current artist.

So anyway.

I was listening to It's No Game, Part 2, and I looked at the comments on the YouTube page, and every single one of them was about Artemis Fowl. Some people who like David Bowie because he is David Bowie must be baffled.

I bet Minerva Paradizo's favorite song ever is Party in the USA. Or Eoin Colfer will spite me and have her favorite song be I Want To Hold Your Hand or something decent and tasteful and classic like that. But I hope it isn't.

Desperate

Oh, my gods.

School ends tomorrow.

It will be my last day at a school where I basically grew up, yo-yo-ed between friends and stood up for the ones I actually liked, eavesdropped, laughed, cried, worried and smiled.

Now, I am hit with the realization that I will never never ever go back there as a normal student. Only a little while ago, I would have embraced this and run out of the place screaming.

I hate change. Especially change of mood. Especially change of mood about something important.

I need a stunt. I need something big and miraculous to happen to me. I need something different to happen in my life. I always know what to expect. I hate being like this, but there is nothing exciting in my life!

BLEH.

I am in a dark-gray mood.

Which is not a mood for a Muse or quote.

If you must know.

As you may be able to see,

I am alive. I actually did not dance because fate was kind to me (for once)! I hurt my knee tripping in the hallway right before the skit and the skit had to go on without my mad dancing skills. Oh, wait, sorry. Skillz.
It is really really hot outside. Well, it's hot for where I live, anyway (I'm sure my cousins would have something to say to me if I complained about how hot it was), especially considering it's May. Last May we were wearing coats and full-sleeves until the end. Now we are melting and unwilling to move.
Thankfully, my room is in the basement, which is the coldest place in the house in the summer. Unthankfully, everyone wants to move there now.
School is ending in four days, and I have a list of things that I would like to do over the summer. Most of them are watching certain movies and reading certain books. There are also a few things that I would like to bake this summer, like Blondies (a vanilla brownie). I've had them once, and they were delicious!
There is a thing that I was discussing on the phone today with my cousin Questa, who, if you have not guessed by now, is the same person as J. I will give up J and just say Questa.
So I was talking to Questa about Twitter. Ah, Twitter. You suck.
Nobody cares what you are eating right now, unless you happen to be Taylor Swift, in which case K is very interested. Anyway, I am assuming most of us are not Taylor Swift. Or K. So we don't really care about when you go to the bathroom! Do not share it with us!
So we were thinking about a guy who tweeted the stupidest stuff, like:
I am not going to tweet anymore. *post*
I am going outside, and I'm not tweeting while I'm there. *post*
I'm outside, and guess who's not TWEETING! *post*
I'm deleting my Twitter account, yo. *post*
I'm so sick and tired of Twitter! I don't even tweet that often! *post*
Here I am, about to delete my Twitter account! *post*
You won't hear from me anymore! Not like you heard me a lot anyway! Good-bye! *post*
Hovering over the delete button... *post*
There. I deleted it. SUCKS TO YOU. *post*
I can't tweet anymore. I hated Twitter anyway. *post*
And etc.
We went on like this for a half-hour. What if someone made a Twitter account like that? Would anyone actually read it?

Quote for Sunday, May 23, 2010:

A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat.

-P.J. O'Rourke

and

A man is nothing without his hat.

-Buzz Lightyear, Toy Story 2 (1999)

(http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Hat)

Muse for Today:

How much cake can I eat in one sitting without exploding?

Will I ever find out?

Why do I care?

How Embarrassing.

I am clumsy and quiet, which translates that I embarrass myself a lot.

Which is somewhat counterproductive, because the whole bloody point of being quiet is to minimize all embarrassing moments. Does this work? No. Not if you go to my school, where everyone from four years down to four years up knows your name.

Usually, I have no excuse for the stupid things I do. They usually involve dancing, because I could not dance to save my life, although I have yet to find a situation in which I would need to dance in order to save my life. Can you imagine that?

Evil Villain: All right. I have captured you for some unfathomable reason, because you neither hold exceptional power, intelligence, beauty, or money.

Me: That sounds reasonable. And kind.

EV: Now that I have you and am waiting for a response to my ransom note, I will need you to do something.

*dramatic pause*

Else you shall DIE.

*dramatic pause*

I shall need you to dance.

Me: What?!

EV: Go on! The Worm? The Macarena? The fist pump? Anything! Your doom awaits!

THEN I would die. But nothing that desperate has happened to me yet. Still, it just so happens that most, if not all of my embarrassing moments occurred because of dancing, clothing, sneezing, exiting or entering rooms at inappropriate times, and one time, cornbread and Snapple. I don't even remember what happened, just that cornbread and Snapple were involved somehow and that it seemed quite scarring.

Not scarring enough if you've forgotten, says my mind.

Shut up, mind. I am trying to tell a story here, and your comments are not helping. You've already put me horribly off track. Look. I was talking about dancing and now I'm talking about cornbread. Shame on ye.

Ah yes. The embarrassing moments that I push myself into hardly count. I don't even remember those. The ones that other people do to me (which also mostly involve dancing) are the ones I remember best, like a time in the sixth grade that I have only ever told B about. That was scarring.

THIS one. Involves DANCING. It is making me so ANGRY and ANNOYED and SCARED that it is CAUSING me to CAPITALIZE important words.

I don't want to. BLEH.

I will let you know if I survive with my dignity intact. (Which I won't.)

Quote for Thursday, May 20, 2010:

Nemo enim fere saltat sobrius, nisi forte insanit.

No one dances sober, unless he is insane.

-Cicero, Pro Murena (Ch. vi, sec. 13).

(http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Dancing

)

Muse for Today:

The fact that school ends in FIVE DAYS and that my gym clothes smell like they were dipped in perfume concentrate because of the Girls' Locker Room, even though my socks smell bad.

And this, which is a t-shirt design that I wish I'd made:

What do I love?

• Right now? Not much.

I'm still running off of yesterday. The hatred is still present. Hopefully not perpetually, because that would make me an angry teenager. That is too cliche for me. And I don't know how to be a goth.

I Hate...

• the song 'Hips Don't Lie' by Shakira.
• various people with whom I go to school.
• war.
• the presence of war in Social Studies. Can't we talk about anything else?
• Math. Especially GEOMETRY. My hatred for Geometry deserves its own post.
• e-mail. Not all of e-mail, actually. How I DON'T CHECK IT AT THE RIGHT DARN TIMES.
• people who chew their gum like cows.
• book banners.
• bullies.
• the song 'No One' by Alicia Keys.
• people who look sad all of the time/are always crying.
• tests. ESPECIALLY MATH TESTS.
• stupid project partners who don't do their work.
• stupid friends who act like they're not your friends sometimes.
• secrets.
• feeling helpless.
• speaking in front of people.
• mannerless people.
• any song by Ke$ha and Justin Bieber. They could be lovely people, just please don't allow them to sing.
• Sundays.
• Mondays.
• dances.
• dancing.
• it when people say that seafood is not meat. Yes, it is.
• people who have obnoxious laughs.
• several game show hosts.
• when it's too too hot or too too cold.
• unfair teachers.
• people who are too too perfect/too too nice because they are definitely hiding something.
• backstabbers.
• traitors.
• reality show people.
• people who are angry for no reason.
• people who are not angry with me but take it out on me anyway.
• bad books.
• corrupt politicians.
• several people who go to my school. Did I say that already?
• when the Internet dies.
• cleaning my room.
• cleaning anything.
• Susan from The Chronicles of Narnia: The Last Battle because she's such a doofus.
• Twilight ripoffs, like this one book called Fallen (don't ever read it, it stinks SO MUCH).
• angry silence.
• the sight of gratuitous carnage/blood.
• certain boys who go to my school.
• certain girls who go to my school, especially one who fake-bakes and looks orange. She also wears too much makeup- you can see the oil building up at the side of her nose. We have the same birthday.
• that that girl and I have the same birthday.
• phonies.
• when things don't work out.
• people who roll their eyes when they think that you aren't looking.
• MTV. I thought they played music. Apparently I was wrong?
• Sonny With a Chance. The only good thing that came out of that was "Really, Chad? Really?" Well, that's not the only good thing. But it stinks now.
• vomiting.
• people who won't read.
• people who won't read and convince others not to read.
• Wizards of Waverly Place. That show is just plain bad and I knew it from the start.
• headaches.
• bad soap operas.
• bad movies with bad actors.
• sexual/violent video games.
• memorizing nonsense.
• writer's block.
• pongal, which is an Indian food that you might have had before. If you haven't, you are missing nothing.
• when people act like they're really cool when they're not.
• petty anger.
• hypocrisy, which I am displaying a generous amount of with this list.

And this isn't even all. I might have to do a Part Two to this.

My Last Chance

...to publish a post in April.

Either time flies or I don't blog very much.

Ha. I think we know which one it is.

Tum de tum de tum. Tra la la la la la.

Muse for Today:

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury- the book, not the movie.

It's banned-book buddies with The Giver by Lois Lowry, with which it is quite similar.

Quote for Friday, April 30, 2010:

“Holy Kleenex, Batman! It was right under our noses and we blew it!”

and

“Holy strawberries, Batman, we’re in a jam!”

-Robin [I'm not sure from exactly what]

(http://greatsayings.blogspot.com/2005/03/batman-and-robin-quotes.html

)

Stupid Joke

Hip-hop music that is no longer in style should merely be referred to as 'hop.'

Humans are Stupid

I think that the idea of people was bad and then it just went downhill from there. I mean, what do people do? Consume more than they produce. Pollute. Bully. Fight wars. Cut down rain forests. Take over everything. Drive H2s. Leave the lights on and the water running. Leave fast-food wrappers lying around. Have two people living in McMansions made for a small army.

And what do, say, monkeys do? They can't drive! They don't have running water or electricity! They live in the darn rain forests! They live in harmony with the environment, while humans just fight against it. What do we do so we can live? Displace animals and cut down trees and drain lakes and rivers and...and...

I need to shut up.

I apologize for this rant (actually, it wasn't a very long rant. If you watch me, I could make a whole blog ranting about book banners and genocide and people I hate and embarrassing things they make us do in school like ballroom dancing, for crying out loud! What if I'm not going to the dance? Do I need to do it then, huh? Huh? HUH?) but people make me so angry. Let's take a boy who lives down the street from me. I'll call him... Boy Who Lives Down the Street From Me. BWLDTSFM is a hapless, obnoxious character, but otherwise he is okay. Somewhat. No, not really, but he...no. Anyways. Let's pretend that he has some redeemable qualities.

BWLDTSFM is a chronic litterer. Since he lives down the street from me, he goes on my bus and he is constantly chucking food wrappers and water bottles out of the window.

(On an entirely unrelated note, have you noticed that boys often spit? Like donkeys, they'll sometimes just turn their heads to the side or open the window and spit. K is starting to do this, although he is a young 'un. Why? Girls usually just swallow their saliva. How come boys can't?)

I hate him. He will one day slip on wrappers and die and I will think "I told you so!"

Another thing. Do you know how sometimes you drive by a car that has its windows open and it's blasting the music so that everyone on Jupiter is annoyed? Well, why do you always hear rap or hip-hop? Why don't you ever drive by a car that is blasting classical music?

Quote for Monday, April 26, 2010:

Ach du lieber! There's a strange little girl over there, staring at us!

-One of the Three Little Pigs from Shrek 2 (2004)

Muse for Today:

The fact that I haven't done a Muse for Today in a very long time. Epic failure.

Also, my math class. We are flying kites.

Book Banning

I mean, really?

A while back the American Library Association released their list of the most banned books for the 2000 to 2009 decade. Harry Potter was at the top, of course, because of people who probably have never read the books, but:

Junie B. Jones and Captain Underpants were on here! They were kind of high up, too!

Seriously. My cousins, my brother, me, almost everyone I know grew up with at least Junie B. Jones! How is it bad? She talks the way that real kids talk!

Some books that I like(d) that were banned:

1. Harry Potter (series)
2. Bridge to Terabithia
3. To Kill a Mockingbird (not many other people like this book, but I do)
4. The Giver
5. Blubber
6. The Adventures of Super Diaper Baby (Yes. I am ashamed. This is the only Captain Underpants book that I've ever liked. I've read more (shame shame) but this is my RELATIVE favorite.)
7. Speak (actually, this book creeped me out. I can see why some parents would like to ban the books. No. Wait. Give us the freedom to choose our own books, please.)
8. Mick Harte Was Here
9. Fahrenheit 451 (I'm reading it now.)
10. Junie B. Jones
11. A Wrinkle in Time
12. Goosebumps
13. Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret (you'd be surprised how many of Judy Blume's books are banned)

To see the list I'm blathering about, click this link.

Oh, John Green

Hooray for John! As one commenter, claressadubs, eloquently put it, 'sorry hank, but you just got burned.'

Background info:

The two Green brothers set a time limit on their videos- about four minutes long. If one brother breaks the time limit, the other one gets to set a punishment for him.

In an earlier video, called 'John and Hank Take on X-Scape!', John mentioned how he was scared of the Frog Hopper. John made a video that was too long, Hank told him he had to Frog Hop.

(And, while on there, tell Hank he loved him, but the audio is gone. Stupid Lady Gaga.)

I think I have to read The Great Gatsby now.

Be Useless

I found this, 'this' being the Official Crayola Website. On the Official Crayola Website, you can digitally color with crayons!

The hyperlink takes you right to the page, I think.

This is my lovely drawing. (Don't laugh. Please. Please don't laugh.)

Yes, that is a rocket ship. I do not have good digital drawing skills.

It's a...colorful picture. I think that's the most that can be said for it.

Avatar

Happy New Year! If you are reading my blog, as I hope no one is (but you are) this applies to you.

Last night I listened to MuggleCast, like the Harry Potter dork that I am, and re-read the first Harry Potter book for the trillionth time. K got on my nerves and spilled food a lot (we had Thai food that my mother and grandmother made) and it was fun. The food was good, although K is getting on my nerves with his insistent urge to watch TV all the time. (I know that's unrelated. No, YOU'RE stupid.)

We followed the countdown on TV and ate ice cream, and I have never really cared much about 'Oh, it's a New Year.' Despite most of the drivel being spewed about 2010 being a whole new decade, this year, like last year, I was pleased to note the following things: I Survived and I Am Not In Jail. (Of course I noted other things, these are just the first I note. Pitiful? Slightly. Practical? Immensely so.) (I have never been in jail and I am hopefully not dead. I am far too young to be either.)

I did fall asleep at about one o'clock because I was listening to New Year's Day by U2 on New Year's Day, something I have thought about for an entirely unreasonable amount of time.

Just a few minutes ago, we came back from Avatar, that James Cameron movie. (For short, is he James Cam?) (I don't think I've ever known a movie director better than the actors.) (I know there is a man. And I know there is a lady. There is usually a man and a lady. But sometimes not. And some other men. But that's about it.) It is either really overhyped or really good. I wouldn't know, because we didn't see it. Sold out, all the IMAX ones, and the one we did go see didn't have any seats- well, they did have seats, but people have their purses and jackets saving seats.

We're going again tomorrow. And we are pitching a tent at four o'clock tomorrow morning to get seats, and we will sit in the theater until 12:15.

So. What is it? Really good or really hyped?

It probably doesn't even matter. Who can honestly tell anymore?

Quote for Friday, January 1, 2010:

I'm a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy.

-Raise High the Roof Beam, Carpenters (1955) by J.D. Salinger

(http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/J._D._Salinger)

Muse for Today:

People. Especially people who can't wait until you get out of the movie theater so they can attack your former seat with popcorn and handbags.